RSM: Having a Blue Monday – They Grow up so Fast

I am not quite sure was it is about today but I’m feeling awfully blue. I suspect it’s how I handle the end of things. This year my daughter graduates kindergarten and moves on to first grade. As she graduates, so do I.

Let me explain.

We have a child care facility on site at work. The facility was started by a group of parents 25 years ago and is run by a board of trustees (all parent volunteers) that is responsible for the business and a director responsible for the day to day opertions. The child care center also has a state certified private kindergarten program.

I’ve served on the board of trustees as a volunteer for 7 of the last 8 years. I took one year off when I had my second child, the daughter who’s about to graduate from kindergarten, but other than that I’ve been everything from a member at large, to the Vice President and currently the President (three years in a row).

Since she’s graduating from the school in June, I really should move on as well. It’s time for me to take my need to volunteer and turn it toward the grade school my oldest already attends and which my daughter will attend this fall. I know that this is the right time, and I have found another parent that loves the school just as much as I do, to be President after me. Still, I’d serve on the board forever if I could. I have always had a really difficult time with endings.

I originally joined the board way back when so that I could be more involved with my children’s day to day world while I was at work. My full time job necessitated daycare, but I wasn’t going to just drop them off and go. I like to help. I’d like to continue this tradition of volunteering my time in support of the grade school they are attending now, but I am finding a hard time thinking about saying goodbye. I’ve got a few months, but choosing the next board (a job that falls to outgoing members) is making it more real to me.

I have grown to think of the teachers a family. I look forward to stopping in every morning to check in on how things are running. When fall starts, and I no longer have to stop in to check on the director and assistant director, I can only imagine how empty my mornings are going to feel.

It almost goes without saying that this feeling of loss just magnifies the conflicting feelings I have about my children growing up. If it’s time to move on from the child care facility, that means it’s time for my children to move along as well. How did they get to be grade schoolers? If that went so quickly, I am sure that I will be saying the same thing in five more years when my son is graduates from grade school and movies on to high school.

Before I had my children, parents told me to hang on tight because time will simply fly by. They were right. I just wish I’d hung on even tighter! I want to slow things down.



About rocketsciencemom
I am a rocket scientist in my day job, and a mother of two all the time. I'm a pop culture addict and amateur artist in my spare time. My typical preferences tend toward sci-fi and fantasy genres but I love a good drama or comedy. Reading the blogs of fellow Lost fans over the years has motivated me to finally write my own. All drawings and images on this blog are property of RocketScienceMom

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